Woman with naked back holding a flower over her spine.

There is only one reason for pain, be it mental, physical, spiritual, emotional. Something needs attention.

I write about my personal life because, while to some it may appear to be unprofessional, the truth is that by being forthcoming with my pain, it helps my readers to know they are not alone with their own.

I have been in physical pain for about two weeks now and have sought treatment. Some works for a bit, some doesn’t. The important thing is I do seek treatment, which when I was STRONG for all those years, I did not.

The pain is located in the lower right back. Should that have been right lower back? I am a stickler for grammar. I used to be one of those people who would grin and bear it, having been raised by a mother who treated illness as a friend. Hypochondria doesn’t even start to describe it. I watched my precious John in denial for some time, even from me, the almighty knowing woman.

When he decided to go for treatment, life changed. When he decided no more treatment, life changed too, for the better in some ways. We can’t wait too long to recognise these messages from ourselves. It is important to be able to know what kind of discomfort requires investigation and what is a passing annoyance.

Of course the first person I phoned was Dr. Michael Kaye , who is an amazing Chiropractor and that’s not all. When I first went to him years ago, I was experiencing a pain in my left rib cage and my doctors at that time couldn’t identify it. He did and treated it successfully.

In addition to being the best Chiropractor on the planet Earth, he is a health and wellness expert. He and his wife Frances – earth angel – created The Center for Functional Health. (I forgive him for not spelling Centre correctly.) I have no hesitation in recommending his services and he is funny, which helps enormously!

Years ago, John wrote a letter to the newspaper, a rare occurrence, but received a message that they do not write articles on individuals. This is the letter. John didn’t write about anything specific, but his experience touched him and obviously me too as I still have it.

It was written March 14, 2005, addressed to the Managing Editor, Robert Unger, at The Intelligencer in Doylestown.

Re: Dr. Michael Kaye, Sellersville

“Dr. Kaye is a most unusual practitioner. He is a Chiropractor with a very different approach to his patients.  The noise most heard in his office is laughter which is a very important aspect of healing. His patients really enjoy him. However his determination to diagnose specific challenges is quite amazing. He is dogged and will not give up until he knows the answer.

I would like to suggest that the Intelligencer bring Dr. Kaye to the public’s notice. On a personal note, he discovered a condition in one of my friends that doctors could not find for years and treated it successfully.

I would appreciate attention paid to a person who could be incredibly helpful to people in pain, accompanied by the wonder medicine of humour.”

Sincerely, John R. Roberts


The following week, a full page article appeared on how a woman decorated her apartment! I re-sent the letter, and still not even a response.  I endorsed every word and would write it again if newspapers had changed.

There is an article about Dr. Michael and Frances Kaye in Suburban Life with both of them on the cover.

Article screen shot

Why am I writing about pain?

Something quite remarkable happened today. I decided to rest on my bed, with an ice pack on my lower back. The spasms didn’t quit but I remained still hoping that a cat would come and comfort me. She did. Her purring really helped and then something happened.

Lying or laying there (never could get that right), I heard words through my brain. Not voices  – don’t panic, although I would welcome them too. The words were very clear.


Put my hands together? Really? That questioning didn’t last long. I put my hands together and within a minute, the spasms stopped. Am I going to explain that? Absolutely not. I kept my hands together and am able to sit here and write. I don’t question these things.

In addition, a cool breeze came into my bedroom and settled around me. I looked out the window. The huge fir tree that lives out there didn’t move. I just said, “thank you”.

Shortly before all this happened, I had walked very carefully and looked at a picture we have had for years. It’s a London scene of Big Ben, the Underground (tube) and some other building together with a large cloud. We bought this picture about twenty years ago. I love it.

Looking at it as I approached the kitchen, I noticed the cloud for the first time. It is the face of a dog! As many of you know I have wanted a dog for years but where I live it is not conducive unless one is home to walk the pet regularly.  I am not.

So I kept looking at this picture and now I have a dog and I don’t have to bother with introducing it to my cats. (It’s about time readers learned how weird I am – it’s kept me going for all these years so I’m not giving it up now). Actually, on writing that last sentence, I find my peculiar attitude to life has made me approachable to many who think they are losing it, when if they paid attention they would realise they were gaining it. Ain’t life grand?

In addition to not feeling well, my ‘fridge’ isn’t functioning properly. Normally I would panic at the thought of buying a new one. For some reason my attitude to life and treatment is not well received so the work is infinitesimal these days. Let me explain that.

I believe I gain more with honey than vinegar in my work ethic. Many do not – that’s it.  No work for Dr. Yvonne Kaye! So I am contacting two refrigerator “doctors” tomorrow in the hope my lovely one just needs an adjustment, like Dr. Kaye does for me!

John in Ireland

This is important as since John died I would be upset when anything like this happened. My brain caused all kinds of concern. When I allow this to happen, my brain is a bad neighborhood in which to reside. I have to do some evicting. The aspect of this is that I am remarkably calm, feel relaxed and will leave these concerns to the experts of which I am not one. (I can hear my English teacher – Mrs. Brown – groaning at my grammar). She brought my writing to life when I was fifteen and that’s another story of those heroes.

As you can see, my grasshopper brain is in full charge. No further explanation.

When I think of those who do not like me being so personal I believe I have hit on a reason why I am not asked to speak as I used to.

What confuses me is that they continue to read my blogs. Isn’t that masochistic?

Anyway, since I speak about my life experiences, that will continue. I am LIVING HISTORY after all and if I feel some of my happenings will help others, it will continue. The sad thing about these blog posts is that they don’t get to a lot of people. I do ask that those who do read them share them with their own list and some do, so thank you entirely.

Even when I wrote about the remarkable Dr. Michael Kaye I knew it would reach a small audience. How do others do it I wonder? How do they get a large readership and hear from their readers? I have two or three comments with my blog posts sometimes and they are always the same people. 

I know there are others who have similar awakenings to share that would help those in need. My fellow writer friends, such as book author Edie Weinstein, rely on reader feedback to see if we’re writing about interesting topics that people care about. We welcome your help getting the word out to the public about our work. And I always want to hear from you, so please share your thoughts in the comments below, or privately with the form or on my Facebook page.

As I mentioned in another blog, I have a book whose title says it all, called What Others Think of Me is None of My Business by Terry Cole-Whittaker.

I have never read the book.

Now I will explain, which I rarely do, because when I say or write this, people tend to think I am arrogant. A bit perhaps. However, this title speaks to me of not paying attention to those who are negative, who write comments without a signature.

I am open to constructive criticism from special people who have my best interests at heart. I used to pay attention to that one negative comment on an evaluation rather than the 190 who were positive. In addition I’ve spent decades teaching women how to say No or Yes, not to explain and to concentrate on those special people who love and communicate with them well.

Since writing these last paragraphs, my friend Donna arrived to see how I was. She and I have much in common and this time she was able to refer me to a ‘fridge doctor’ so it was a special visit.

What we talk about doesn’t belong in a blog as it is so widespread. What we did agree on is that Dr. Dan Newman from Cincinnati Ohio needs to visit! He is on my list for being one of my most trusted men.

During our conversation I invited her to co-author my book. She is a professor and teaches writing among other things, so who better? I am so relieved. She has many intelligent suggestions I never even considered. Procrastination is an enormous character defect of mine being a deadline person, so that is the first thing I have to write about. Brilliant! All I have to do is do it.

This endeth this chapter and verse on little miracles, recognizable opportunities, wonderful friendships (I am truly blessed with the people and animals in my life) and a sincere request that I hear from some of you in addition to the loyal three. Now wouldn’t that be luvverly!

Photo Credits:

Woman with flower – photo by Hadis Safari on Unsplash

Photo of John, owned by Yvonne Kaye.

One thought on “Pain

  1. Hello my dear friend. How well timed is your blog. I have been super busy redesigning my tool room and turning my office into an actual bedroom. Painting, putting together furniture, running electric wire needed for new closet light, hand sawing up my old desk for trash day Thursday, helping Chuck take down our magnolia tree that has died, searching for boxes of antique glass to take to the antique mall to try and sell over the holiday season, so needless to say my back is killing me. I do want to come see you, Donna, and Stash but I have to go to Las Vegas the 2nd week of November to ship back all of our winter clothes that we foolish sent out there TWO YEARS AGO! When I reach my breaking point and need some relaxing down time, and the money permits, I will make it up there I promise. OH plus the fact that the building our stuff is stored in has sold and we’re not sure when we will have to move everything out. So in my spare time I’m looking for a new studio where I can create an actual workshop and art studio. So time to get in bed and let my aching back stretch out until morning. I love you Mama and miss you so much. Take care and good luck with your refrigerator Doctor’s and getting rid of your pain as well. Love always! Dr. Daniel Nemwan

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: